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Friday, September 4, 2015

Why I Shouldn't Be Watching Horror Movies

I created a mental "Horror Movie Checklist" last night when I was lying frantically in my bed unable to sleep because of something my mother told me.

I was watching Paranormal Activity for the first time yesterday, and my mother said, "Oh my goodness I will never watch that. When you watch that, you open yourself up to the demonic spirits."

Crap. As I lay there, I realized that the spirits and ghosts were definitely onto me now.

She continued, "The more afraid that you are of them, the more you are opening yourself up to them."

I was practically hyperventilating in my bed. My ceiling fan rustled some papers in my bedroom and that's when I knew it was all over. I was never getting to sleep. This whole situation is ironic, because my favorite TV show is Supernatural, and I have yet to be haunted by any demonic spirits (knock on wood).

So, as I said, last night's experience led me to create a mental checklist while watching scary movies in order to prevent another episode of "Help: Leah Can't Sleep." A simple list of just four points, this is my thought process as I lay in bed after watching a scary movie.

1. It's Just a Movie
This may seem like a no brainer, but it's very difficult to do sometimes. Especially when you watch a creepy girl with black hair crawling through your television in "The Ring," or when a mysterious hand comes out of the girl's head in the shower in "The Grudge." I'm going to be honest, I had to do continuous circles while showering for an entire month after watching "The Grudge," and I kept my hands on my head at all times. Merely safety precautions, of course. I clearly knew it was just a movie. Totally.

2. Other People Have Survived After Watching "Insert Horror Movie Title Here"
My brother was the one who told me about "Paranormal Activity." He's still healthy and kicking, and I don't believe he is currently being haunted as far as I can tell. In fact, my brother has seen the entire "Paranormal Activity" series. He might not be afraid of them, but when the first film is claimed to be the scariest movie of all time, I'd like to respectfully disagree.

3. If I Die Tonight, I Have Lived a Wonderful Life
If the monsters or creepy ghosts from the movie come to life and bring me to my doom, I've decided that I have lived a great life so I can't complain too much. So long, and thanks for all the fish.

4. I'm Watching a Comedy Next Time
Yep, definitely not going through this again.

Until next time,